Cracklin’ Bread

A Doctor Visit
Lord Have Mercy, but it has been hot and the irrigation engines have run overtime. The lake behind my home has sunk so low that the green moss and grass on the pond bottom has shone forth and the Osprey, geese, wood storks, curlews and all manner of wading birds have been having a ball, not to mention a full belly. 
I watched a wood stork, a huge bird with black tipped wings, tear strips of bark from a small cypress and eat it. I have seen them use it to line their nests but never seen one eat it. Oh, well. You learn something new all along.
A Bald Eagle circled for several minutes Sunday afternoon and then I saw a raccoon make a break from the open lake edge to the thick brush. I guess he didn’t want to be the eagle’s main course. Lord, I love living in the woods with the critters.
My Mother, almost 92 and not shy at all, had a doctor’s appointment and I was supposed to take her but my sister-in-law, I call her Sister, volunteered to take her instead. I asked my older brother who was down from Atlanta, if he wanted to go with them. He said not really but his conscience got to bothering him and he went along anyway (I was hoping for this because I knew what was likely to happen as it has happened to me several times.) 
They arrived at the doctor’s office and were seated in the waiting room and had been waiting for quite some time.  Mom got up, went to the window and asked sweetly, “Do you all have a Doctor here?” and when the attendant replied, “yes”, Mother asked not sweetly at all and very loud, “Well, where the heck is he?” 
This was just the beginning of sorrows, for Mom had no more than sat down when a very large lady wearing spandex came in. 
This large lady puttered around the office a little while and just as she walked past, Mom leaned over to Sister and whispered loud enough to be heard in the next room, “Would you look at the size of that woman! Good Grief.” 
Sister just slid down in her seat and looked the other way for there wasn’t a thing she could do to hush my Mom. 
It did not stop there as Mom kept it going, “Lord Have Mercy but I’d be ashamed to let myself get that big.”
Older brother pretended he knew neither Sister nor Mom as the big lady eyeballed them.
My younger brother texted Sister, his wife, and asked if they were through at the doctors and she texted back, “No, we are still in the torture chamber.”
An hour later, still at the doctor’s, she texted, “Stick a fork in me. I’m done.”
My older brother texted me and said, “I am beginning to see why you asked me to come along on this adventure. Remember what they say about payback.”
I wonder just how aggravating I will be if I live long enough to have to get my family members take me to the doctor. 
I am looking forward to it already.
 
See page 4-A in the Wednesday, August 10, 2016 edition of The Douglas Enterprise

The Douglas Enterprise

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Douglas, Georgia 31534

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